an open letter to dance teachers: what will your students remember?

Dear dance educators,

When your student “makes it”—when they land a role in a major company, step onto a Broadway stage, choreograph their first work, or even move on to a life outside of dance with pride and confidence—what will they remember about you?

Will they thank you?

Will they credit you for your support, your belief in them, your guidance and appropriately timed tough love during difficult times?

Or…

Will they remember the time you told them to watch what they eat?

The time they were praised for losing weight… but not for their artistry?

The way their body felt like the problem, instead of something to be supported?

💬 what they hear becomes what they carry

So many teachers were raised in environments where being “ballet thin” was treated as the highest achievement. Where hunger was normalized. Where shrinking was celebrated. Where weight was tied—explicitly or not—to worth.

And many of those teachers now lead studios or direct programs, hoping to pass down the discipline, the structure, and the technique that made them who they are.

✨ what will your legacy be?

When your dancers speak about their training years from now, what will they say?

Will they remember feeling safe in their bodies in your class?

Will they describe your studio as the place they learned to push themselves and nourish themselves?

Or will they go silent when asked what those years were like?

🔄 you can break the cycle

None of us can go back and change what we were told as young dancers.

But we can choose what we say now.

We can create studios where fueling is encouraged, not judged.

Where dancers are supported for who they are, not how they appear.

Where students leave not just with clean technique—but with a sense of wholeness.

It starts with a shift in language. A pause before a comment. A conversation about what food actually does for a dancer’s body.

If you’re realizing now that you’ve said things in the past you regret—please know: it’s not too late.

It’s not too late to change your approach.

It’s not too late to create a healthy, supportive space—for dancers of all shapes, sizes, and stories.

It's not too late to be the reason a dancer does feel seen, valued, and encouraged.

Every choice you make from here on out—every comment, every moment of support—can help rewrite the story dancers carry with them.

That’s where your legacy lives.

💛 be the teacher they thank

You don’t have to be perfect.

You just have to be willing to choose something different.

Choose to be the teacher your dancers thank—because you saw them, believed in them, and supported not just their dancing, but their full self.

With care,

Melissa

🩰 a note from me

I say this not as an outsider, but as someone who grew up in this system and teaches younger dancers.

I was raised in the ballet world, where the “thin ideal” was everywhere—spoken and unspoken. Where body type felt like a barrier, no matter how hard you worked. And where shrinking was often treated as a sign of success.

Unlearning those messages has taken time. Honestly, at times I still catch myself.

But each step I’ve taken toward my own healing and confidence is also a step I take toward helping this generation of dancers do it differently.

Dance teachers have A LOT to juggle. Why not release those body comments now? After all, they're unnecessary!